Survivors who need a push?

Survivors of abuse are at increased risk for many things.

We are at increased risk for depression, fatalistic attitudes, nervous or psychotic breakdowns, social phobias and "lone-wolf" ways of thinking.

Sometimes we hide from the world, while at other times, we may put ourselves in harm's way, to "prove we're not afraid of anyone or anything". (When really, we know that we are.) Sometimes we're terrified that the abuse or assault will happen again, and go to drastic means to keep that from happening.

There are women in convents that I know of, who went there to feel protected. If we watch the news at all, we see that even nuns are sometimes assaulted. No where is truly safe 100% of the time.

Some people hide in their homes and only have the slightest, superficial relationships with others to keep themselves safe from physical or emotional hurts. I have tried to help some of these women, with only one of them quitting when the going got tough, and not finishing the "Personal Harmony" program that I teach women survivors. She also has a couple of mental disorders that add to her problems, and I guess trying to admit her own problems and not break down from the anxiety, was too much to ask of her frazzled brain. She's under another person's care, and a doctors, and she has talked to me about it, but she doesn't want to continue any more deep emotional work. What she really wants is for someone to wave a magic wand, and all of her problems go away, but that's not going to happen is it? Most people can and do, do the mental work it takes to find a place of peace and harmony with themselves and what has happened to them.

Most people do look for, and find help, but not all. The mental health care system is full of people trying to use pills to fix what only self-examination and self-understanding, and healing time can fix. Chemical depression can be helped with pills, but not the inner wound hurts. They have to be purged like the poison that they are, or they just keep coming up to haunt us.

Some people have just accepted the role of "victim", and that's all they'll see through their dark colored glasses. Everyone is out to get them somehow, and everything goes against them in life. That's not even logically possible, much less probability possible. Until they can open up and accept help, they will never get any better.

Some people live in their own little corner of the world, and may turn into the "old cat lady", that people like to joke about. Their fear outweighs their lonliness, and human friends are just too risky!

"Rebel Without A Cause"? Rarely. Most "outcasts" have a reason for feeling like one, and a good percentage of the time, some psychological, emotional, verbal, or physical abuse is at the root of such ways of thinking and behaviors. No one can fix these "lone wolves", a million + women and men have tried. Only they can decide that this is a problem in their lives, and sadly, most of them won't. They enjoy their distance, it keeps them safe. But, on the occasions when they do, they can go back, revisit then heal what led them to this antisocial way of life, and can enrich their lives and those of the people whose lives they touch. Trust me, I know. "OOOWOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Just a howl-out to those kindred souls who might need a push!

Until next time!

Love, Angelia